Wishing you pain-free days
Support
Vulvodynia
News and Information
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Being A Container
Holding Space For Others.
From the Daily Om
We have all been called upon at one time or another to help a loved one through a difficult time. When the help required consists of concrete actions, such as running errands or making phone calls, we know what to do. But sometimes we are called simply to hold space for the person as they go through whatever they need to go through. They may need to express anger or grief; they may need to talk or be silent. They may need us to hold their hand; they may need us to give them time alone. Whatever the case, when we hold space for someone, we offer ourselves up as a container for the overwhelming feelings they may be encountering due to their circumstances.
When we offer ourselves in this way, the more centered and grounded we are, the better. Our steadiness allows our companion to lean into us for support, as our presence provides an environment in which they can be free to move. We can also help by being responsive, allowing them to dictate the flow of action from talking to not talking, from anger to grief, and back again. By being aware and open, we can help them confront their feelings when that feels right, and back off from them when they need a break. Holding space requires humility, conscientiousness, and the ability to step out of the way, to honestly understand that this is not about us.
When we love someone in this way, we provide a space in which they can simply be. Able to feel what they need to feel without worrying about how they are being perceived. We can provide this offering in person, over the phone, or even from a distance, through meditation. However we do it, when we hold space for someone in need, we are offering a gift of the highest nature.
August 14, 2007
Acupuncture and Vulvodynia by Acupuncturist Maryann Child How can acupuncture work for you? What researchers are finding out about acupunture treatments for VV patients -- information on research findings regarding surgery and VV and more...
Information on Relaxation and Pain Management:
Relaxation techniques have been used with some success to alleviate dysmenorrhea in some young women. According to one preliminary study, the symptoms of menstrual cramps, nausea, irritability, and poor concentration greatly improved after 20-minute relaxation sessions twice per week.
(Reiki is a holistic therapy that is used to promote relaxation.)
Research findings on Acupuncture:
Acupuncture may be a useful therapy in the treatment of dysmenorrhea. A preliminary trial reported that 86% of women treated with acupuncture for dysmenorrhea had complete cessation of pain for three consecutive menstrual periods. Other preliminary trials have demonstrated similar results. A controlled clinical trial reported 91% efficacy with acupuncture compared to 36.4% efficacy with sham acupuncture (using fake acupuncture points) and 18% efficacy in an untreated control group.36 A small trial compared a 30-minute TENS (transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation) treatment to stimulate acupuncture points with a placebo pill for dysmenorrhea. There was a large placebo effect in this study, and analgesia over the next several hours was not significantly better in the treatment group compared to placebo. More controlled trials are needed to determine whether acupuncture is a useful treatment for dysmenorrhea.
Information on Calcium and Magnesium for pain management:
In theory, calcium may help prevent menstrual cramps by maintaining normal muscle tone. Muscles that are calcium-deficient tend to be hyperactive and therefore might be more likely to cramp. Calcium supplementation was reported to reduce pain during menses in one double-blind trial, though another such study found that it relieved only premenstrual cramping, not pain during menses. Some doctors recommend calcium supplementation for dysmenorrhea, suggesting 1,000 mg per day throughout the month and 250–500 mg Q4H for analgesia, during acute cramping (up to a maximum of 2,000 mg per day).
Like calcium, magnesium plays a role in controlling muscle tone and could be important in preventing menstrual cramps. Magnesium supplements have been reported in preliminary and double-blind European research to reduce symptoms of dysmenorrhea.1 In one of these double-blind trials, women took 360 mg per day of magnesium for three days beginning on the day before menses began.
The following is a list of things you should ask your doctor to check for if you have or think you have Vulvodynia:
yeast culture, sensitivity to yeast, systemic or intestinal yeast, erythematous candidiasis? (yeast cells below the surface of the skin)
bacterial vaginosis (gardnerella), trichomonas, syphilis, gonorhea, vaginal B-strep, cytolic vaginosis (or cytolytic vaginosis, also called "lactobacillosis" or "Doederlein cytolysis." - an overgrowth of the good bacteria)
vaginal ph (which can show whether bacterial levels are normal)
herpes (with a swab test or a blood titer) swab tests are unreliable; only a positive test is meaningful - a negative one only means the swab didn't pick up any virus at that time. Also, HSV frequently does not cause the classic blisters. Blood antibody tests are more accurate, especially those that differentiate between the types.)
HPV (If the test is positive, DNA type the strain.)
hormonal problems and imbalances
nerve damage due to trauma
pelvic muscle tension
autoimmune diseases conditions giving the Anti-Nuclear Antibody (ANA) test (Elevated levels of ANAs can indicate that antibodies are attacking healthy tissue)
My Story
My Story: In July of 1999, I developed Vulvodynia. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I went to my Gynecologist who ignorantly told me that it was probably the detergent I was using and sent me home with yeast infection medication, even though I had explained that I had used at least 4 doses of it already in the last 6 weeks. I thought that I might have an STD and so I visited many support sites. (Does this story sound familiar to any of you?) Well, through that search I found a doctor who told me the bad news. Three months after my onset, I had my diagnosis. I was one of the "lucky" ones.
After many years my experience with Vulvodynia has changed. I no longer suffer on a daily basis but my journey was a long hard one. Like many of you, I tried the conventional route, trying different medications. I would find initial relief only to then see a reverse in the effects. I also suffered with some side-effects of the medications. I found that what the MD's have to offer is little to nothing and only masks the problem; and never gets to the underlying cause. With a weight gain of 30lbs on my five ft frame and living with daily pain I walked into an Acupuncturist's office one day and started my road to recovery.
The majority of MD's say it isn't a wide spread disease. Those are the ones who acknowledge us at all. The rest would like us to live in the dark ages. They tell us to relax and it will "all go away". However, estimates show that as many as 15% of all women develop and suffer from some form of Vulvodynia. Experience has shown me that not even half have shown their voices. We cannot wait in silence for a cure, or hope that someone else will raise their voice. We need to support one another in voicing our rights for better treatment. It is time to show the world how many of us there are. It is time to get loud. It is time to take responsibility for our own recovery. And we can do this together. It is time to make our voices heard! It is time to take a role in our recovery. It is time for us to get involved.
I have been contacted thousands of times over the years asking for my help and/or advice. While more than not I have heard "thank you", I have also gotten some negative responses. I'd like to believe that means I am doing something right. I believe that makes me fall right in the middle, taking no sides and makes me as independent as humanly possible. I do not run this site for any other reason than to offer some free information.
I clearly remember what it was like to live in such pain, be so confused as to my choices and have little to no information available at my fingertip. When I started this site in 2000 (13 years ago), I wanted to make sure that no one else has to go through that too.
Here is what you WON'T find on this site:
the tauting of surgery
a strong push for current medications available
I cannot in good faith push current medications or surgery on the population knowing the side-effects and the efficacy rates to eleviate the pain. I would never tell any adult they don't have the options of drugs, but I clearly will not state that I feel this is the best option. If you read my story, you will see that I too did go down that road. But if you are asking for my advice that is not what you will hear from me.
When you do reach out for help (to me or another woman who has posted on this site) here are some key things to keep in mind.
Be open-minded and ready to receive answers you wouldn't expect. Those who came before you have experienced so much and each path has been very different from the other.
If you have a specific question ask it. Don't expect the person you write to, to be a mind-reader. If you are someone who only wants to know about drugs say so. If you are not open to alternative medicine let that person know so they can get you the information you need or if they can't they can clearly tell you so and point you to another source.
Before emailing questions, read this site in its entirety. You just might be surprised to find the information available to you already. The pages on this site include a listing of recommended doctors from other patients.
Support doesn't necessarily mean giving you the answer you wanted to hear. Many times it can end up being just the opposite. This disease is so complex and we have to be honest with each other in our truths in order to give the best help and support to the next woman. Sometimes this can be a sad experience, but in the end the truth shall help you find the right path to your healing.
As always, wishing you ONLY pain-free days.
Lauren
Pain-free
Days
This site is for informational purposes only. It is not for diagnostic use. All information posted is for information only and you should seek the advice of a medical professional before trying anything.
This site is not updated on a regular basis. The owner makes this site available for informational purposes only and does NOT visit the page nor the email box more than once every few months and sometimes less.